Are you an idiot or a maniac? People always see themselves as “normal” and so anyone less risk-tolerant/more obedient is an “idiot” and anyone more risk-tolerant/less obedient is a “maniac”.
You decide what meaning the events in your life have to you.
https://yourmeaninginlife.com/blog/you-can-find-meaning-in-whatever-happens-to-you
Asking where you see yourself in five years is a good exercise to determine both where you're going and what you want to be doing today to reach your desired future state.
https://yourmeaninginlife.com/blog/where-do-you-see-yourself-in-five-years